Read my poem. do you like it?

tall babes
Alex Musetta. asked:

Just curious.

Helpless.

If I lose you,
If I lose myself along the way as well,
If I lose my strength and courage and faith,
I swear on this that I will never be helpless.

I swear on my child’s face and on my pen,
On the gentle ink curve of music notes,
On the schoolgirl’s silly smile brought forth by the love note she hugs close.

Sometimes I wonder why I prolong the inevitable,
Sometimes the pain in waiting is unbearable,
Because I know,
If it isn’t today, it’s tomorrow.
What’s another two months?

But you will never need to hold me,
Save me,
Caress me back to sleep like a newborn ****.
You will never have to help me walk,
Or help me bathe,
Or carry trays to and from my bedroom,
Our bedroom,
Loaded with food I will not eat.

If my dignity dies before I do,
I swear on this that I will remain tall,
Even bedridden.
Even dying.
Even now.
I swear that I will never need you,
I will never take away your life.

I will walk until my legs give out,
I will teach until my knowledge evaporates,
I will fight until my hands won’t form a fist,
I will dance until I cannot hear the music,
I will sing until my lungs don’t draw breath.

And I will love until I can’t remember,
And I will be strong,
Brave,
Good.

And I will not accept a helping hand,
Not even Death’s herself.
Because though she will try to tug me from your embrace,
I will hold on.
And I will not be helpless.



Comments (5)    Posted in Poetry    

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5 Responses to 'Read my poem. do you like it?'

  1. Ladydriller - August 20th, 2010 at 3:58 pm

    i think its really good, just a little more work and it should be great

  2. Mariana Hobbs - August 23rd, 2010 at 5:14 am

    where did you get the talent that was an amazing poem.

  3. Tori ♫♪♫♪♫ - August 25th, 2010 at 1:23 am

    It’s beautiful.

    This line sings to me:
    On the gentle ink curve of music notes,

    Reminds me of my mother, and her struggle to live. I lost her in Feb. It wasn’t even a cold day, but I was constantly chilled:

    I will walk until my legs give out,
    I will teach until my knowledge evaporates,
    I will fight until my hands won’t form a fist,
    I will dance until I cannot hear the music,
    I will sing until my lungs don’t draw breath.

    And I will love until I can’t remember,
    And I will be strong,
    Brave,
    Good.

    And I will not accept a helping hand,
    Not even Death’s herself.
    Because though she will try to tug me from your embrace,
    I will hold on.
    And I will not be helpless.

    It’s amazing. You took me on a ;journey that was unexpected, back to the day in the hospital when I saw the desperation in her eyes and finally said, “I don’t want you to go, I love you so much. But if this is what you want, I let you go.” In 2 minutes all respiratory and cardiac functions failed.

    Thank you for sharing this. t

  4. § Baby's Blues Rock § - August 25th, 2010 at 11:32 am

    Nice conceptualization, however it is a bit heavy in spots, you might think about taking out words that only lend weight to the mix and are unnecessary or excessive.
    Thanks for sharing this.

  5. ttt520328 - August 28th, 2010 at 11:01 am

    Just curious
    and sadden
    So helpless
    and stricken
    Is it real
    or simply
    a poem.


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